Turkey Withdrawals

I still haven't had any turkey. I have the shakes, the shanks, the shimmers, the shivers--and especially the drools. Sorry. No simplistic illeration with "drools", but I really wanna have some effin' turkey bird! I will have some leftover turkey tomorrow when I go to my parents' place to exchange gifts for an early Christmas with my bother's family. I won't be able to see them at Christmas, so tomorrow is as good as any day. Is that important? Well, hell no! We're talking turkey here, remember? And since I didn't have turkey on Thanksgiving, I think I'll buy myself a small bird next week and bake that bitch. Or maybe I'll have a cornish game hen . . . Oooo that sounds good, too!
Three minutes later: I went outside for a smoke, a silly thing to do since I still feel like crap, but I'm glad I did. For the past couple of months there has been a fox around here that enjoys raiding the dumpster. I saw him, he saw me, but I don't think he cared. He went to other side of the road and looked at me while he munched on some sort of bone that I assume he found in said dumpster. Now that he's seen me on most evenings, I don't think he cares whether I'm there or not. Next time I'll have to grab my camera and share the pic with friends. He's a gorgeous little creature. After he ate his bone, he paced around a bit, and kept an eye on me. I think he really wanted to go back to the dumpster, but he didn't want to turn his back to me, so he didn't. He did, however, sit relax and just look at me. Which was cool.
Shit. My wonderful night time medicine is kicking in. I'm pooped.

I Missed Thanksgiving

I started getting sick last night: a sore throat, aches all over, a terrible headache and an upset stomach. Over night, I must have had some strange fever dreams because I kept waking myself up by talking in my sleep, sometimes yelling. So I had to quarantine myself from the rest of the family. I stayed home all day and switched between my bed and my couch, shivering my ass off even though it was a 75 degree day.

No turkey for me. :( No stuffing, mashe taters, acorn squash, corn, cranberry sauce or pie. I'm heating some chicken and noodle soup right now. I hope I can eat it because I'm pretty damn hungry and really tired.

Maybe I'll feel good tomorrow and I can drive to the parents, give my nephew and niece a little attention, and raid the parents' fridge for leftovers.;)

I'm a Weirdo

I'm probably the strangest person I know. Isn't that sad? I can switch from being coldly logical to a pure romantic in such a short time. Talking to me is a complete pain in the ass. My conversation is fragmented. I switch from subject to subject without any semblance of continuity. If someone is first getting to know me, then I appear intense, so intense that most people don't know what to make of me at all. Isn't that a shame? It is for me. Once you know me, then you'll know how quickly I can get upset and how quickly I can come down, laugh, and then be light-hearted again. But it takes time to understand that. My friends and family understand it, even my young nephew and niece. Hell, now that I think about it, children understand me pretty well. Maybe I act like a kid too much. ; People know when I'm unhappy, excited, embarrassed, nervous, whatever emotion I feel. I hide nothing. And man, I gotta tell ya', that scares the crap out of people. I'm an adult who has no fear of saying, "This is how I feel and I don't care who knows it." Most people have no idea how to deal with it. That doesn't mean I'm rude. As far as I know I'm never rude or mean to anyone. That in itself causes even more confusion. What am I trying to say? I guess I'm saying it's difficult for people to get to know me. But it's not--if people would stop looking for me to have some alterior motive. I don't have any. I just express how I feel. No games, no chess playing as if I'm showing emotion or logically arguing something just to gain an upper hand. I don't care about that. I don't even know if I have a point to this. I'm just writing. No point really. I just want to get to know other people and want them to get to know me. If you don't express how you feel and what you think, then how is this ever done? I guess people put too much emphasis on consistency, thinking that because you've acted or said this or that, then you must obviously act or say this or that in the future--as if you have an agenda on life. Well, I don't have one. I don't pretend to. I take it as it comes. And for that, I seem inconsistent, erratic, confused, devoid of grounding, and too damn human. But all I do is express myself, in the moment, at one point in time, trying to experience THAT moment, because once it's gone, it's gone for good. Dammit! I will feel it. I will think about the moment. Because tomorrow, thoughts and feelings will change as you gain perspective. But if you're always looking for perspective, waiting for that moment when you are calm and reflective, then you have lost so much of the experience of life. And yet, I'm surrounded by those who are too concerned of what others think--this calm and reflective thought of "What will others think of me?" That's a shame. How much of yourself do you lose every time you think that?

Logging In Successful

So now I can write indepth blogs, since I've finally circumvented what seemed to be a convoluted logging in requirement that probably says more about my intelligence than my patience. Oh! The joys of the net! ;)

Testing

I created an account a few days ago, intending to blog some a few days later, but I never could log in. This is a test. Possibly a test of my patience. ;)